Ahoy J.A. Readers!

I’ve been charged by my organizational superiors (the Editors) with the task of increasing Johnny America’s popularity by 50%. How they intend to track its popularity, or what “popularity” means in the context of incredibly obscure literary zines, they refuse to say.

Still, I’d hate to lose the free bourbon press they allot me each fiscal quarter, so to that aim I am proud to announce my visionary publicity strategy: asking our loyal readers to put up J.A. stickers in their home towns. There’s a whole wide world of automobile bumpers, dive bar toilet stalls, vintage Trapper Keepers, kittens, subway signs, and other non-porous surfaces just waiting to be benignly vandalized.

If you’re willing to show your affection for J.A. through small and petty crimes, we’d be honored to send you free stickers.

Yours,

Richard the Intern